What goes up when the rain comes down?
What do snakes do after they have a fight?
Hiss and make up
What kind of animal goes OOM?
A cow walking backwards
What's Forrest gumps password?
Why does a chicken coop only have 2 doors?
Because if it had 4, it would be chicken sedan.
A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel in his hat. The bartender says "Hey pirate, whats with the paper towel?" The pirate replied
A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we've got a drink named after you." Grasshopper says "You've got a drink named Steve?"
Why did the blonde take a right into the ditch?
Her blinker was on
What has a face and two hands but no arms or legs?
What has a bottom at the top?
Where does a 500-pound canary sit?
Anywhere it wants
What did one toilet say to the other?
You look a bit flushed
What is put on a table, cut, but never eaten?
A deck of cards
What belongs to you but others use it more than you do?
What's black and white and makes a lot of noise?
A zebra with a drumkit
WHERE CAN YOU FIND AN OCEAN WITH NO WATER?
ON A MAP
How do crazy people go through the forest?
They take the psycho path.
What do prisoners use to call each other?
Why don't skeletons fight each other?
They don't have the guts
What has 4 wheels and flies?
A garbage truck
Where do pencils go for vacation?
What is red and holds water?
A red bucket
What is a vampire's least favorite meal?
Why is a giraffe's neck so long?
Because its head is so far away from its body
What bow can't be tied?
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can't tuna fish